How to Find Happiness in Your Life

How to Find Happiness in Your Life Happiness Print How to Find Happiness in Your Life By Arlin Cuncic Arlin Cuncic, MA, is the author of Therapy in Focus: What to Expect from CBT for Social Anxiety Disorder and 7 Weeks to Reduce Anxiety. Learn about our editorial policy Arlin Cuncic Updated on July 21, 2019 More in Self-Improvement Happiness Meditation Stress Management Spirituality Holistic Health Inspiration Brain Health Technology Relationships View All In This Article Table of Contents Expand Always Be Improving Surround Yourself With Happy People Recall Positive Memories Collective Goals or Self-Transcendence View All Back To Top Are you on a quest to find happiness? While happiness might feel elusive or out of your reach at times, that doesnt make it an impossible journey or goal to achieve. On the contrary, happiness could be waiting for you around the next corner if you just hang on. Or, it might be even simpler than that. Happiness might have been with you all alongâ€"you just may not have taken the time to realize it was much less complicated than you once believed. You probably know its not about driving the newest car or having the latest gadget. But, what is it that really drives happiness? Lets consider four studies from around the world to answer that question. Verywell / JR Bee     Always Be Improving A 2007 study reporting on data from the British Household Panel Survey revealed an interesting set of findings of the roots of happiness. What is it that makes us happy: getting what we want or having what we want? Paradoxically, it seems that its not the state of being married that makes us the happiest, but rather dynamic events such as starting a new relationship. In the same way, getting a new job had a greater effect on happiness than employment status. Becoming pregnant had a greater effect on happiness than being a parent. Similarly, events such as starting a new course, passing an exam, or buying a new house were all also high on the happiness scale. In contrast, events with a low relation to happiness included the end of a relationship, losing a job, and losing a parent. What does all this mean, and what is making people in Britain happy? Lets take a moment to figure this out. Positive dynamic events seem to be key rather than static situations. While this may all sound a little superficial, it makes sense to some degree if you consider happiness to be a momentary state. What can we glean from this study? If you want to pursue happiness in your life or stay positive, realize that there is always the possibility that some happy event is waiting around the corner for you. And if you dont feel like waitingâ€"go out and make something happy happen. As the quote from Abraham Lincoln goes, The best way to predict your future is to create it. Surround Yourself With Happy People A 2008 study reported on data from the Framingham Heart Study conducted in Framingham, Massachusetts followed 4,739 people from 1983 to 2003 to answer one interesting question: does our happiness depend on the happiness levels of the people around us? Startlingly, the results of the study showed that to be precisely the case. People who are surrounded by happy people are more likely to become happy in the future. Whats more, the analysis revealed that this effect was the result of happiness spreading, not just an artifact of happy people tending to hang out with one another. According to this study, if you have a friend who lives within a mile of you and that friend becomes happy, the odds of you also becoming happy increase by about 25 percent. The same was true for spouses (up to 16 percent improvement), siblings living within a mile (up to 28 percent), and next-door neighbors (up to 70 percent). Interestingly, the happiness of coworkers was shown to have no effect on the happiness of those around them. What does all this mean? Surround yourself with happy people as much as possible, because its very likely that their happiness will spread to you. Recall Positive Memories In an Australian study of over 300 young adults, it was shown that those who recalled memories about problem-solving (a time when you successfully managed a challenge) or about identity (something that shaped you to become the person you are today) showed decreased negative emotions and increased positive emotions, respectively. These findings suggest that simply thinking back to a time in your life when you were overcoming a challenge or to a time when you went through a significant life experience that changed you for the better could be effective in boosting your mood, and therefore, your happiness. Collective Goals or Self-Transcendence A 2019 study out of South Korea using data from the Korean General Social Survey (KGSS) showed that respondents prioritizing spirituality were the most likely to be happy, followed by those who valued social relationships (friends, family, neighbors). People who placed the most weight on external achievements (money, education, work, leisure) were the least likely to be happy. These findings suggest that the path to happiness in South Korea is not about all that glitters with goldâ€"rather, going after goals related to collectivism or self-transcendence may be most important to boosting and preserving happiness. A Word From Verywell Its clear that what makes you happy may depend on where you live in the world (although these are limited studies that looked at different concepts). The British valued positive change, Americans grew happy when those around them were happy, Australians became happy when remembering positive memories, and South Koreans were happiest when engaged in collectivistic and spiritual pursuits. The common thread, however, is that happiness is ever-changing and your happiness meter can always be boosted. If you truly want to pursue happiness, surround yourself with positivity and see beyond your present circumstances to the bigger picture, both in terms of people and your place in the greater universe. The Psychology of Positive Thinking